If you volunteered for clean-up at the church Fall Festival, then you
need to choose a side in the dishwasher wars about:
WHAT NOT TO PUT IN THE DISHWASHER
It’s the church women who ignore the list of No-Nos on the
wall over the machine. Years of dipping their hands in hot water and grease-eating
sulfates have hardened their kitchen-warrior attitudes.
Vera says: “If a dish won’t stand up to a good scalding, then it hasn’t earned a spot at a potluck dinner.”
That’s not meant to be harsh. It was actually the men who put up the list. They frequently try to explain how the washer works….
WALT: “Now, look here. Most dishes can’t stand the heat. This machine gets so hot, you could wrap salmon filets in foil, run ‘em through a couple of cycles, and they’d be cooked. Completely cooked!”
VERA: “Oh good grief. That sounds like something you’d do.
You must have stock in the detergent company if you want us to hand wash
The men’s list of “Taboo Items” include:
- Wooden Stuff
- Plastic stuff
- Fancy stuff/Crystal/chinaware
There’s more, but The Ladies have
crossed them off the list (even though they ignore the list).
- *Cast iron skillets
- *Insulated travel mugs
VERA: “What kind of an idiot would put a cast iron skillet in a dishwasher? It’d turn it into a rusty doorstop. Not even you would do that, Walt.”
WALT: “Nope. I never wash any of my cookware.”
VERA: “I have no doubt.”
So the kitchen debate continues with each event. It makes for interesting clean up.
In the spirit of controversy some joker has added a few “Allowed” items on the list.
OKAY TO WASH ON TOP
- *Baseball hats
The Ladies haven’t marked off these items. Vera says…
“JUST PUT ANYTHING BUT A PRICELESS ANTIQUE IN THE DISHWASHER AND FORGET ABOUT IT.”
After all, the dishwasher was invented by a woman who got tired of the servants chipping her fine china.
Josephine Cochrane is said to
have exclaimed, “If nobody else is going to invent a dishwashing machine,
I’ll do it myself!”
In 1886 she created a
motorized washer. Her company is now part of Kitchen Aid.
I don’t know if Ms. Cochrane was Lutheran, but I bet if she were here…
she’d ignore “The Not Allowed List” too.